I work. That is what I do right now. That is what I am good at. That is what I know how to do. I don't have to face difficult life altering decisions when I am at work. I don't have to worry about what to wear, I have a uniform. I don't have to worry about my looks, all my colleagues are female. I don't have to feel personally responsible if I can't help people because something is out of stock.
But the truth is, I do. I do worry about the important decisions in life. I do worry about which jeans or what skirt I put on. I do worry about my hair and make up. And I do feel a personal defeat when I am unable to help out a customer.
Why? Well, I take pride in being good at what I do. I find my identity in being good at my job, being kind, looking pretty etc. Maybe that doesn't correspond well with what God tells us about identity and self worth. But this is, never the less, most certainly true for my life.
I listen. I listen to music. A LOT. I listen to birds and cars and other things on days when I can't find my headphones. This happens on a regular basis. I listen to music when I'm happy or when I'm sad. When it's a long trip and when it's short. Sometimes I listen to music on my break. Like right now. Maybe I do it to drown out my thoughts. Maybe to shut out the world. But mostly I think, I do it because I love music. It's therapy for the soul. And I love it. A LOT...
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