He is jealous for me

...loves like a hurricane, I am tree bending beneath the weight of his love and mercy, when all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory, and I realize just how beautiful you are and how great your affections are for me.

Oh...

How he loves us

We are his portion and he is our prize, drawn to redemption by the grace in his eyes, if his grace is an ocean we're all sinking.

And Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss, and my heart turns violently inside of my chest, and I don't have time to maintain these regrets, when I think about the way....

He loves us!

Getting Older

I am 23 years old, and I have a patch of gray.

By patch I really mean more like 6-8 strands of gray hair all located within the same area, approximately the size of a lifesaver mint. Which really isn't a big percentage of all the hair I have on my head. I don't know the exact amount, you would have to ask God about the answer for that one (read through Psalms, you'll see what I mean).

When I first found out that I had a gray hair, I tweezed it. I was 21 and terrified. Who starts graying at 21? Well, apparently I do. When I found the second gray hair, I tweezed that one too. And the next one. And the next one. Then I talked to my mom about it (who by the way is pretty gray herself) and I told her that I had been using tweezers to get rid of them, her response? Well it went a little something like this,

Don't pluck them, you'll go bald.

Thank you?

I think that was the response I came up with.

Obviously, my mom meant that if I kept plucking away, there would come a day when I would actually be bald, because ALL my hairs had turned gray and I had just been plucking away. Let's just stop right there, before the mental images of bald me get to disturbing.

So today, about 2 years and 10-15 gray strands of hair later, I have come to the conclusion that I don't actually mind the few grays I still have. So what if I'm only 23, and have a patch of gray? Doesn't that just give me character?

I wise woman (my sister) once said the following,

Don't think of them as your grays, but as your wisdom.

And I think I'm gonna go with her on that one. Why would I want to get down on my self for getting older? It's inevitable. I can't actually stop myself from aging, and I don't really think I want to either. As I get older, I learn so many new things about life. As I get older, I discover that getting older really isn't that bad. And as I get older, I realize that it's okay to be different, even if that means going gray at the age of 23.

I think I'd look good all dressed in white

The title really says it all.

Fitting Rooms

I hate them, it's that simple.

Fall

This was actually written back in november 2008, but back then I only wrote in danish, so I did a little bit of translation. And here it is...

Fall… The leaves are falling slowly but surely to the ground! Very determined – ‘We want to come down, we want to get away, we are ready for winter to come, ready for the cold and hopefully also snow’. It is beautiful and it happens so fast. The sun sets earlier and earlier, and mittens and scarves that used to be a possibility is now a necessity. Wool socks are suddenly a blessing, and even the people who used cuss at tea and fireplaces, suddenly start to seek them out more and more. Christmas is getting closer too, but hush, we can’t talk about that for at least another few weeks, God forbid that we whip out the Christmas spirit too early, we might just run out of it before Christmas actually gets here.

Sighs…

But the good kind of sighs, the kind where you breathe in through your nose and then quickly let go, just to realize that you are exactly where you want to be – mentally, physically and spiritually. And then again, I guess there is always room for improvement. But nevertheless, am I left with a feeling of peace, I am ready for the snow and the cold, I just hope I will remember to bring my mittens.

Doors

Door #1

I fell like I am standing in front of thousands of doors, just waiting to be opened. Each one of them represent an opportunity that I can take, or a direction I can choose to go. If I choose to open door number 1, it would probably reveal a wonderful room. Maybe even a kitchen, where I could cook all kinds of foods for the people I love. A place for great conversations and discussions to take place. A place for life to be lived, a place to love and be loved.

Door # 2

I could choose door number two and it might reveal a completely different room. It might be a living room, fully furnished with soft comfy couches, beautiful paintings on the walls and a rocking chair in one corner. A place to relax and have fun. A place to feel at ease no matter what the world on the outside looks like.

Door #3

Or I could pick door #3. Behind this door I might find a bedroom, it might have a huge bed and a build in closet, that could fit more clothes than I could even dream of ever owning. It would be a place to rest, but obviously also a place for fun. A place of great intimacy and of great responsibility.

All three of them would be great rooms. They all have different things to offer and I would love each one of them equally. I have to make a choice.

But how?

Am I even confident enough to make that choice?

If not, I'll just be stuck outside the doors, waiting.

The exact same spot as I am in right now.

An Open Ending

Sometimes I just need to listen to my music.

An Open Ending by Tina Dickow

Tell mamma, you'll be ok
Tell her - stay calm,
Tell daddy, it's much too late
To twist your arm
It's time to go and find something that's yours that no one can steal away
It's time to open the doors to your secret place

There's no answer as big as the question
There's no victory as big as the lesson
You go on and you see where your detours will take you to

There's no power like understanding
There's no beginning like an open ending
You hold on you don't stop to
Believe if you follow through you will learn what is good for you
Someday soon, you will know what is best for you

Tell mamma, it'll be alright
Tell her - have faith
It's time go on and find something that lasts
That no one can lose or break
It's time to own up to the task and go make your own mistakes

There's no answer as big as the question
There's no victory as big as the lesson
You go on and you see where your detours will take you to

There's no power like understanding
There's no beginning like an open ending
You hold on, you don't stop to believe if you follow through
You will learn what is good for you
Someday soon, you will know what is best for you